Happiness is an inside job

Happiness is an inside job, if you wait for others to make you happy you might wait forever. 

Why is it that people blame others for the way they feel? I just had a conversation with a friend who tried to explain how the behavior of her partner affects her and makes her unhappy. I used to be in that position of claiming that if this person or this other person was this way or did this I would be happy. Until I did an inside job and found out that I could make myself happy whenever I wanted. My happiness didn’t depend on how others behaved towards me but on how I behaved towards the situation.

Once you’ve realized that it becomes easier to be happy more often. Everything starts by accepting the major fact that you can’t change other people you can only change yourself. Instead of spending your life in a miserable way complaining about how others treat you. You should work on how you react when that happens. There is this proverb that says “ you can’t hurt me unless I let you” and lately I’m starting to realize that it’s actually true.

So now when someone says or do something that I don’t appreciate, most of the time I still repeat it in my head saying how mad it makes me feel. But then quickly I manage to turn it around by telling myself, that I can’t change person x, I accept him or her the way he or she is and ask myself for patience and strength to do not let this affects me.